I’m a lesbian…
Actually, I’m bisexual, but I’ve been in a long term relationship with a woman for a few years now so if we’re talking about practically applied sexuality; I’m a lesbian.
fan of mixed martial arts.
I consider it mine. Not mine alone, but mine in a sense that I love, honor and cherish the sport in tandem with millions of other people around the world. The controversial nature of this sport inspires it’s fans to bind together in an effort to defend what we know to be a beautiful, honorable sport from those who wish to take it away from us.
It may shock you to learn this, but I am not the only homosexual fan of mixed martial arts. I’m not even the only lesbian fan of mixed martial arts. In fact, many of the women who report on or participate in mixed martial arts are queer. Lucky for me, I don’t hear fighters, promoters or fans going around calling each other dykes. Instead, their homophobic statements reflect a disdain for male homosexuality.
Logic leads me to believe that perhaps these fighters wish to distance themselves from the obvious initial observation of the casual sports fan of nearly naked men entangled on the mat in positions that remind them of sex acts. Judging by the homophobic comments I’ve heard from fighters, they would surely be disgusted by the thought of a gay man becoming turned on by watching their sweaty muscled body rub up against another man.
Assuming this is true, isn’t it amusing that they might prefer a straight man become turned on by the thought of them getting knocked unconscious?
I admire fighter’s bodies as much as any fan; male, female, gay or straight. I might even like a fighter more because I think they’re sexy and have little celebrity crushes. But do you know what keeps me hot for this sport despite the fact that I get the feeling by some that I am invading macho sacred grounds?
It’s heart. The heart we witness when fighters stand up after a knockdown, wobbly, knowing full well they could get leveled again in seconds. Fighters who are dominated, bleed like faucets, tear muscles and break bones but answer the bell for the next round because they have the heart to fight until their bodies won’t go anymore.
It saddens me that so many people who love this sport don’t appreciate the heart and courage required to live a life as an out gay man. Sexism is still deeply entrenched in our society and many people cannot accept gay men who behave on the streets and between the sheets in a way that they qualify as female. I guess they don’t consider the balls of steel required to be openly gay in a world where you are continually ostracized, a frequent target of violence, not protected by your government and told you are a gross, hellbound abomination.
Like casual straight MMA fans who are in it for the gore porn, perhaps it’s true that casual gay fans are in it for soft porn. Who cares? Like their straight counterparts, many of these pay-per-view buyers will eventually grow to fully appreciate this beautifully complex and compelling sport. Isn’t that what we all want? More fans, more money, more fights?
This sport is mine, and I fully intend to let my gay brothers know that it can be theirs, too.
@m4quinon
Sing it!
Hell yes.
Wow, I posted this on my Facebook page and got reamed for it. Very telling…
I see that. It was brave of you to post it. I have to wonder which of the men who commented actually read the entire post.
I’m not gay, but I have no issues know as a gay friendly site if such delineations were to be made. Wish it didn’t, but reading those comments…
I tried to read the BE comment thread but just couldn’t. Perhaps if I had jumped on the thing earlier, I might have been able to tolerate it.
Suffice it to say that I am glad you wrote this. I wish more people wrote things like this.
I had the whole “wrestling is gay” fight all through high school and I’m really really over it. Yeah, wrestling is hell of gay. Grappling is hell of gay. MMA is hell of gay. The folks over at kink.com (nsfw) are making a killing on that very premise.
What most people haven’t been able to tell me, though, is what the hell is wrong with that? So what if it is?
Thanks, Dimas.
I read this last night, linked from your fp on Gals Guide. There were a lot of points I wanted to respond to but I REALLY didn’t want to get that comment section mired down like the BE one was.
Great article. Homophobia is an issue in MMA and out of it. I won’t go into the double standards that annoy me personally, or the fact that it’s derogatory to act female (what’s wrong with being a woman!!??) in some of these guy’s minds. But in MMA, especially as it catches on with new fans, these fighters are looked up to. They are role models whether they want to be or not. And the homophobia is therefore being presented as an acceptable way of thinking. This can only make the overall problem worse outside of the sport.
You rock, my dear. Nothing like blatant truth to stir things up!
So you funny you write about this. I have a side note on a related topic.
I started ‘training’ MMA (going to classes at an MMA school) about a month ago. There are various classes including boxing and Sil Jun Do but I primarily attend 4: Jui Jitsu, Muay Thai, Grappling, and MMA. I had wondered about the grappling classes before I started. Not in a homophobic way but in a ‘what is this going to be like’ kind of way. Kinda hard to explain but I think you get it. Anyway, since the very first BJJ class, and the very first submission I learned (armbar from mount), all of that went right out the window. I really dont think about that. In fact, you are taught to use your cup as a fulcrum on the guy’s elbow to give you more leverage during an armbar. How cool is that?
I dont think the stuff you talk about will go away. But I know that the people who are really into it, love doing it and wont let outside influences change who they are. I know I love rolling already and I’m starting to get into Muay Thai as well (soon as my shoulder heals anyway). I think I like BJJ and grappling a bit more right now because you can use 100% of your ability (strength for now) and apply it to someone else. Something special about sinking in a rear naked choke or an arm in guillotine in full guard and cranking on it as hard as you can
When I’m doing that, I really dont think about the dude I’m squeezing or how freaky it could be perceived as.